Rabbit Holes, Hurricanes and Baby Jesus - Update #26

Three completely unrelated things, that until a month ago had no relation to each other, other than they were words in the English language. December 10 the perfect storm started brewing. Now you may think ‘perfect storm’ that sounds negative… well in our case it was completely the opposite. Perfect because after long wait my girls were home and ‘storm’ because that is the adjective to describe the craziness that ensued. All of which was fantastic. Ill get back to the unrelated items as we go.

Joanna and I survived the first number of weeks and Christmas was approaching quickly. We ventured out to North Vancouver to be with my mom and had a wonderful day celebrating the birth of baby Jesus. The girls behaved and didn’t embarrass me… j/k, the only small blip was the car ride home at which time Marika expressed her displeasure about being strapped into a car seat. Joanna’s parents made the trek up from Seattle and we had another fantastic day with them on Boxing Day, our family being all in one place has been a special treasure that we will not soon forget. The girls continue to surprise, our cautiousness with how we expose them has paid off in spades as the girls now seemingly sleep well after visiting family and friends. We haven’t travelled a whole lot as it would be nice for the girls to have spent more time at home than they have elsewhere, which isn’t the case yet. It will be very exciting for us to over the course of the next couple of months for the rest of our family and close friends to be able to meet these gifts.

I am not much for sayings but this is one of my favourites that has become apparent both in my work and parenting life; ‘don’t chase more than one rabbit.’ What I mean by this is find something you want to achieve and go after it until you’ve grabbed it. For us it has been easy to see one thing with the girls and then another and then another, in the New Year we have become much more diligent with our habits, this way once we get them used to something we can move on and master something else. Work; well that’s been another story. I feel like I am staring at a field of rabbit holes and I have no idea which one to go down. It feels slightly odd that I am more confident with having twins at home than I am in expanding my company. Right now the formula is simple for the girls, feed, clean their diapers, keep them healthy, spend as much time with them as possible and repeat. Work, well the formula is not so clear. I am super excited to have brought on team members to work for Coastal Fitness, thus allowing my company to be in two places at once. I love working in teams maybe that is why being a Dad with Joanna as my teammate has gone so well. I can only hope that I can foster that same environment within my business.

Here’s one for yah, ever tried to be productive in a hurricane? Stupid question I know, my point is why do we ask the most of ourselves in times when we realistically only have about 25% to give to the situation. Settling in with twin girls you think would be a good time to take a step back and soak it all in. Nope not me, New Years, new clients. Three significant business projects all requiring my undivided and a dog with a patient spirit the size of Texas, but even he needs to get out to the park. So how to progress? No, correction, how to hold batten down the hatches? How to enjoy the girls, keep clients happy and stay married? Here have been a few of my effective coping strategies:

Coffee
Less frequent but better quality napping.
Stay up later
Delegate
Ignore personal hygiene, just kidding; seeing if you read this far and didn’t just skip to the pictures
More coffee
Pray
Watch less sports, (Oilers are having a terrible year anyways)
And finally be super duper grateful for the people that have been lending us a hand during our time in the hurricane.

Watching the girls get bigger and doing new things is something that I will never take for granted. As silly as it sounds often when they are crying we are laughing because, well A: they are so darn cute even when they are howlin and B: you don’t name your kids ‘Wished for, Wanted one; and Beloved’ if they weren’t truly just that. The girls are rolling over now, Marika looks as if she is ready to crawl out of the room. She and her cousin are going to be quite the active pair. Kyra is the analyzer and content one, unless of course she’s workin on a big one. The smiles that they are now able give when we tickle them has quickly faded the memory of tubes and incubators. I don’t think it is too bold of a statement to say we are living with miracles. I like that, ‘living with miracles’, a good little reminder for us all to appreciate the blessings in our lives.

We have started to be able to have people over to help with things around the house as well as meet the girls of course. This has been super helpful as I found out when mom went out for 3 hours and I thought I was being productive by kicking some laundry closer to the back door on its way to the machine….. The meals have been a life saver, not to mention tasty, some really good soups have been consumed in the last number of weeks. We have been very thankful that the girls for the most part sleep during the night. It is not unusual for us now to only get up once between 11 and 6-7 am. If these girls were less cooperative this update may well have been pushed to Easter. My apologies that things haven’t been updated sooner, I know many of you have invested in our lives and I do appreciate that, its just 2:34am blog updates tend not to get proofread and quite frankly get downright incoherent. Thanks for the prayers, enjoy the pictures.

Ryan

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The Most Wonderful Time of Year! – Update #25

The Jobs household has undergone significant changes over the past couple of weeks. Having the girls home has brought overwhelming joy to the hearts of not only ourselves but our family and numerous friends. Just to give you an idea, the blog has had over 10000 hits, so a super thank you all for your immense support and prayers through all of the ups and downs.

Obviously sleep is something that is scarce lately; many said “rest while you can”, or “store it up now” In theory all good advice, but to be honest, storing up sleep in my professional opinion is not really possible. Things have gotten much better than the first few nights. If we keep the girls from getting too stimulated during the day we find that they have a much easier time going down. One more quip that we thought would be applicable to us, “sleep while they sleep.” I have found this to be rather humorous as we have two kids who eat on different schedules and momma has to pump, and most often this all happens in one glorious succession. This results in a train of activities that basically doesn’t end. Oh well that is why there is two of us, our teamwork is being put to the test, and I must say I think we are coming through in spades.

Working has gone well, with my job I am able to be home at different points during the day to relieve momma for an hour or so. Our counter space has been held ransomed by the copious amounts of bottles, nipples, soothers, and various other paraphernalia in different stages of sanitization. Again a quick thanks to those who have been providing meals. To say food prep right now is a small challenge, would be a colossal understatement. So again our deepest thanks.

The girls are adjusting well to home life; they spend most of the daytime out in the living room in either our arms, a bouncy chair, the swing thingy, the bassinette or getting used to a little ‘tummy time.’ Night times rotate between the pack and play that is set up in our room and the nursery. Usually feedings happen in the nursery so others are not disturbed. They are growing and eating well. Bath times are enjoyed far more by Marika than by Kyra, hopefully this will change over time so Kyra has a more relaxing time.

The tale of our first Christmas is to come…. Stay tuned.

Here are some more pics of the completed nursery (click the picture) and of the girls of course.

Home Life

Ryan

Answered Prayers and a Long Night - Update #24

Looking back it may have been a better idea to write this update before the 37 minutes of sleep we got last night. At any rate here we are, our little family; home after long last. If it weren't for this blog there are definitely weeks that have gone missing from my memory in the last 4 1/2 months. Now, I take a step back and mention how we made our way home.

Marika was ready to be at home sometime last week; Kyra on the other hand had some catching up to do. She still had a feed tube in her nose and was on the monitors while Marika had shed both the week before. The hospital had intentions of sending Marika home first and keeping Kyra till she was ready. Not something we were too keen on; as once Marika left the NICU she wouldn't be allowed back in. As you can imagine, this would have been a logistical nightmare for us and logistics aside we thought it would be in the girls’ best interest to keep them together. Easier said than done. A full hospital and kids from all over trying to get in, then there's us, fighting for our sanity really, the hospital visits to be honest were starting to wear thin; we were now into our 18th week of hospital associated events, and if not for those two bundles of pure joy, I may just have gone squiggly. :-) In the end, they honored our wish to keep the girls together.

Our time in the Abby NICU was a very good one, welcoming, and professional, caring and friendly. We tried to use the time as wisely as possible, asking questions and perfecting tasks that we would have to do over and over on our own in the months ahead. Friends were made and a visit will be in order when the 'lock-down' of flu season has passed.

A window opened and we all climbed through. We were off to pediatrics. A room became available that we all could stay in. Well, this turn of events turned out to be fruitful. We now were able to sleep there and commence being full time parents. I think this was the best of both worlds, around the clock care and a little help if we needed it. I think our sleep was decreased to a measly 3-4 hours a night.

The girls being preemies and having the rough start that they had expectantly have a tougher time dealing with stimulation and change. The nurses and docs on numerous occasions have warned us of this fact but we didn’t really see the effects until the day after we moved. They were unsettled and just couldn't calm down. With the lights low and little in the way of interaction they transitioned over the next day. Kyra initially took a down turn and needed significant portions of her feeds through the 'NG' (Nasogastric Feed Tube). This worried us as we had anticipated only being there a few days to allow Kyra to finish the progress she had made in the NICU. Well, as it turns out she made a bigger step back then subsequently 3 large bounds forward! Her feed tube was removed and we challenged her to eat what she could via bottle and realize that the easy tube feed was not coming. Well she responded in spades. Taking nearly her whole feed for 2 days straight. The doc was up until that point fully prepared to send us home with her tube in, after we had properly learned how to check for placement. The prospect of this seemed a little challenging since neither I nor my wife are nurses, but if it meant sleeping in our own bed again as opposed to the convertible chair thingy that we had been inhabiting, I was all for it. I mean how hard could it be, we're smart people..... Kyra sensed our apprehension and made the decision for us. I think she was scared of me fidgeting around with a tube coming out of her face. ;)

After this, the girls had one more hoop to jump through, the car seat challenge. They had to be able to sit in the seat without having an oxygen desaturation or an apnea. They passed this test with flying colours. The road was now paved for our homecoming. The culmination of thousands of prayers on our behalf, allowed us to walk through our front door as a complete family.

Shortly after unloading and settling in Joanna and I carried this look of shock around with us as the two car seats with two tiny little miracles sat on our living room floor. We then proceeded to stumble around our place looking for the items that the hospital has been providing for the last number of weeks. Drive home; check. Unload and settle in; check. Be crazy excited beyond belief to raise our two little blessings; check.
Well the gloss of our homecoming wore off with a speed rarely seen around these parts. Our girls are extremely sensitive to stimulation and change, and well like many parents of multiples before us; sleep was eluding us as if it had the ring from Lord of the Rings. I think I managed to nod off for about 37 minutes. The upside is that things can only get better.
Our excitement about showing off our little ones is overflowing, so many people have been a part of our journey and yet we are caught right now in a hard place with one of the worst cold/flu seasons, and the amount of hospital time the girls have put in resulting in lowered immunity has put them in a vulnerable spot. All the docs and nurses say ‘just blame us’ when trying to tell people that it is not wise for us to have people over to hold the girls. As time passes they will build up their immunity to their new surroundings, allowing us to gradually introduce new things. I guess this is where I have to be the protective dad and watch out for what I believe is best for my family. This is so hard for us, as we want everyone to see them, snuggle them and hold them. But, in time things will settle down. I will do my best to add more pics, as I have found an easier way to upload them. Yay!
Many people have asked us what they can do to help and have offered to make meals….now is the time that we need this most and are going to take you up on those offers!! Cooking right now has been an adventure…. so thanks to those that have already dropped stuff off.  THANK YOU!! This is a huge help for us!
It should be noted that this is our first collaborative blog effort. We will be back to Ryan’s terrible jokes and dry humour as soon as he scrounges together a few more hours of sleep! 
A note from Jo: THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU to each one of you for praying, supporting, encouraging and walking with us through this crazy adventure. We appreciate ALL of you and know beyond a shadow of a doubt that your prayers made a difference. The peace and calm that I felt in the midst of everything was incredible. Our two little miracles are truly a blessing from God and we feel so privileged to be their parents. Kyra has made such a remarkable recovery that sometimes I look at her with tears in my eyes and am so thankful. They are both absolutely beautiful and I can’t wait for each and every one of you to meet them.

Ryan & Jo

P.S. Sorry for the delayed blog, entries usually take under ½ an hour, this one took 3 days….. :-)



I think that if you click the picture it will take you to our online album where you can see the pics at your convienence.

Twins Double the Blessing

Diving Boards and Shavers - Update #23

Life has a way of moving along even if you are not ready and or willing to come along; this is not our situation. We are willing participant yet it seems as if we have taken a little stop at the rest area and indulged in a little 'free coffee'. The stop was necessary for a washroom break, the coffee on the other hand was not, and in hindsight was actually kind of gross. What I am getting at with all of this is our time in the hospital prior to coming home has been necessary for the girls to develop fully, as well as give me time to complete the 'Honey Do' list. The coffee is all the other things that seem important at the time and later clearly reveal themselves as fruitless time wasters. Lesson learned, keep your eyes on the goal ahead, do not get side tracked by burnt, old, cheap coffee. What is your goal? What is your coffee?

Our girls continue to develop well. Both are putting on weight at a torrid pace, not childhood obesity fast, but getting a little chub is good at this point. One thing I learned this week is that a preemie's weight is not completely correlated to development. Example would be a baby born at a gestational age of 35 weeks at a birth weight of 4 lbs could be developmentally ahead of a 33 week baby born at 5.5lbs. This makes sense now as I look at it but is kind of different when you see other babies going home at just over five pounds and ours are basically almost 7lbs. I enjoy the time at the hospital in the evening, my duties include temperature taking, diaper changing, bathing whoevers turn it is that night, we alternate so mom gets some practice nursing the other. Whoever I bath, generally I feed a bottle to after as well.

Marika is now sans wires. Yep, she has been taken off all monitors. What a strange feeling it is. Have grown accustom to the green, yellow and blue lines on the computer screen. It was somewhat unsettling at first, but I knew she was ready. One step closer to home. Kyra is only a little behind, totally expected considering her frantic start to life. She will not be left behind though, we can already see a beautiful yet competitive friendship developing.

We are now at the time where the girls would have been born had Kyra's water not broken some 15 weeks ago. I have to remind myself now that they are still wee ones and not to 'over love' them. Playing patty cake with your 6 week old preemie is not an appropriate activity apparently. Sorry, you didn't buy that did you? I was kidding of course, I never did that, but gosh are they growing fast, it wont be long before I am tickling them so much we all wont be able to stop laughing. One thing I may be asking for for Christmas is a new shaver. Being close to the babies, Jo reminds me 'your rough'. With to which I respond, "I shaved this morning." Shaving twice in a day is not in the cards, so my apologies to my early morning clients as I may be a little scruffy until I can secure a new electric shaver to avoid the scrunchy face from the girls indicating my poikyness. Yes I made that word up so no need to correct me.

The nursery is done, save some cool wall decals that are currently in the design phase. I am excited about those. Otherwise, shelves are up, change table is in, and the cribs longingly await usage. As well I have also started to train our German Shepherd to smell the blankets of the girls and to be 'gentle' with them. He's so smart, I ask him to go and find one of the girls blankets that I have hidden in another room, and when he does he now gently pulls it off the shelf, or off of where it is and shows me it proudly, all without trying to rip it apart. I can see the makings of a fantastic relationship with him and those girls. I would hate to be anyone who was giving them trouble with him around.


Have you ever been up on the high diving board peering over the edge at the seemingly endless space between your shivering blue toes and the water below? It's your first time up to the high one and your scared, but also excited in a way you can't explain. This fear pulls you back a second; enough time to look out and see your friends playing in the pool below awaiting your entrance. Everyone having fun, splashing and yelling, seemingly without a care in the world. Meanwhile there's you, literally inches from diving into the deep end. Then that fear subsides just long enough for you to make one of the craziest jumps you'll ever make. Your falling, that fear its back.... its too late. All the noise disappears, you scramble, why is it taking so long to get back up... You arrive, gasp, and scramble to the side. Then that excitement overwhelms you as you realize you made it and it was probably one of the coolest things you have ever done. There is a strange tug that lures you to the stairs for another go, then we realize that we don't even have these two past their first Christmas yet.

Ryan

More pics in the morning....



MMM Smells good.

Dinner Time...

Chomp!

Back to snuggling.

The Stretch Drive. Update - #22

Ok ok, I haven't updated as often as we all would like. Them's the brakes, I apologize, kind of! I have spent the last week and a bit focusing on my business, with momma back in action I need to make sure there is still a house for the girls to come home to. I will still update, but just less often and probably not as long.

The girls continue to do excellent. Marika has sailed passed the 6lb mark and Kyra is not far behind. Hard to believe they are over a month old already; we have to remember this sometimes, especially when they are still having oxygen de-saturations from shallow breathing, or a tough time feeding on the bottle and breathing/swallowing at the same time. As you can imagine we are super excited for when we can bring them home, on the other hand it is kind of nice to have the nurses around to answer questions. Never having had kids before these unknowns would probably result in phone calls to parents or other more seasoned friends in search of answers. Definitely a time to take advantage of the resources this opportunity has afforded us.

The schedule is good now! I enjoy giving one of the girls a bath every nigh--we alternate nights the girls get a bath...for now that is! They seem to be becoming more and more accustomed to my speed washing techniques. :) I am really enjoying seeing their individual personalities come through. They both seem very tolerant, but this may change with age. Marika is very aware of her sisters whereabouts; and not particularly happy when Kyra is out and about. The same can't be said about Kyra, she enjoys her sleep and is by far the noisier of the two. Marika has a lot of the Jobs traits; skin, face, and eyes. Kyra seems to have some of the Wingfield traits, with her fairer skin tone. Not too sure on the hair yet as it seems to have changed already in the last two weeks.

Our goals over the next couple of weeks are to tie up the loose ends in the baby room, try some new easy prep recipes with the crock pot and pressure cooker, cuddle the girls as much as humanly possible, get a nap here and there, pray that Joanna's disability cheques arrive, see more friends and family, clean the cars out, get the carpets cleaned..... wow, ok; enough writing I have things to get to. Thank you all for your generosity, prayers, thoughts, and encouragement. We will need extra doses of all of it when life changes yet again in the next month. Enjoy the pics.

Ryan

A reunion and the non smoking farse... - Update #21

Is it possible to have a reunion if you only have been apart for less than two weeks. I suppose it is if that time seemed more like years. Joanna lived two years in two weeks. That all being said when she went back to the hospital yesterday it was if those days of separation never existed. She has shaken the flu that she had and is now spending all the hours with our little ones that she can handle and more. It felt a little weird to be catching Jo up on "how to do things with the girls" and sharing with her all the little nuances that I have started to notice. It seemed like such a stereotypical role reversal, but in our case I just call it good teamwork.

Our house has settled somewhat; our pets are back home, our new tenants have moved in and most of the renos are done. I could tell things were moving in the right direction when Jo had baked muffins for the first time in months (the hospital didn't have an oven!)

Abbotsford hospital is a great place to people watch; big lobby, coffee shop, and every walk of life coming through the doors. I think though, the most intriguing thing I have found so far is the 'we are proud to be a no-smoking grounds/facility' placards all over the place. This is pretty much the biggest crock going. Now before I go further let me preface by saying I am a non smoker, I have never even had a toke of a cigarette, so I have no idea what addicts endure, I have nothing against people who do smoke, I just don't understand this situation. Another thing I don't know is why a big organization like the Fraser Health Authority would pronounce this to the world and clearly not even come close to enforcing it. Here's what I mean, as you walk up to the main entrance to the hospital there are several benches that are in the covered area within close proximity to the entrance. Every one of those benches are clearly marked 'no smoking here!' Without fail 7/10 times there is at least one person sitting there with there with a cigarette exhaling it within plain view of the signage and smelling up the entrance to the premier cancer treatment clinic in the lower mainland????? I guess that in a meeting somewhere or during a press conference the idea of smoke free was a good PR move but why basically invite smokers to sit and chimney it up right in front of the building in a covered area where all the smoke wafts over to where I walk in and out three plus times a day?? It's set up completely to fail. If they enforced that like they do the parking regulations..... never mind that's a whole 'nother entry.

The girls are doing very well and behaving as preemies should. They get tired easily and forget to take deep breaths. Mom with reasonable success has started to nurse and I have successfully fed each almost a full bottle. They seem to love being in the same crib together, it will be neat to see them grow and recognise each other more. They are both on the verge of crossing the 5lb barrier, that was last night so they may be over it as I write this. Their gains have been excellent in the last week, docs thought it prudent to add a dose of HMF (human milk fortifier) basically some extra calories and such. It has made a real difference. You can start to see some of their characteristics coming through as they fill out a touch. Kyra had her hemoglobin tested and was a touch low, her skin has been a bit pale for the last little while and subsequently has been put on a small dose of iron to help that perk up a bit. Bathing the girls has been interesting, Kyra doesn't much like the water so we have employed the swaddle while bathing method which seems to help. Marika conversely looks as if she is at the spa, she gently holds the side of the tub as I wash her, only near the end when she is more hungry than anything does she start to fuss.

As our little family comes together we are thankful for the prayers of many. This crazy coaster rolls on and now that I'm on, I never want to get off.

Ryan


Pics as promised.

Pigs and the Milkman - Update #20

What a difference a few days make. The highs and lows have been almost unbearable. I liken it to riding a coaster at break-neck speed, on a wobbly track with half a seat belt; oh yeah and did I mention that there were no brakes! Being transferred to Abbotsford was great, close to home, I can visit in between clients, Jo can sleep in her own bed and we can enjoy the girls until they get to come home (probably another month at the earliest). Well before we got too comfortable in our little routine, the flu bug has hit. My step mother first and Jo second. Now we are in a holding pattern of frustration, sorta like when you are going to visit family you haven't seen for a long time and you really cant wait to see them again, but there is a security issue in the airport and they wont let anyone out of the plane for hours..... Well this is us, and the peanuts they pass out to make you feel better about it are the pictures I take and show Jo when I get home. The purpose of this entry is not to invoke pity, Joanna is molding into probably the strongest women I know and I am determined to chronicle these events in order to draw strength from later on when another dip in the coaster ride comes along. Situations like this in my opinion would have buried a weaker person, post par tum depression would have set in days ago, yet she holds her head up and is willing to do what it takes to get through this, as emotional as it is, even if that means putting up with my absolutely terrible jokes told in vain in effort to cheer her up.

The NICU has told us Jo has to be symptom free for one week before she can return. Pretty big downer. Of course many ask 'is it the swine flu?', we don't know yet, but it really doesn't matter, treatment at this point is the same. We will be seeking some natropathic immuno boosters, to help her get over the hump. Did I mention already that she is one of the strongest women I know. There's that repeat thing again for those of you who are following along. Those silly pigs are sure causing a stir this season, so please wash your hands, get some hand sanitizer, get lots of rest and fluids and eat healthy. Please pray for a boost in Joanna's health so she can get back to see our babes soon.

My job through all of this craziness is pretty much be the milkman. Momma is pumping for the girls and I am driving it over, holding the sweet ones, changing diapers, bathing them and reassuring them that this will be the last time I change a poopy diaper. That last part there, not happening, I thought is was worth a small moment of thought though. With two bums pooping regularly I can be sure that my new skill set will be put to work soon enough.Not one complaint on my end, every minute is treasured and it is tough to leave every night with those eyes peepin at me.

Ryan




Sorry about the quality, iphone pics.

Top left & Bottom Right Kyra
Top right Marika